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Hillary Clinton, Elizabeth Dole
Will Debate on Jerrry Springer

May 18, 1999 _ Hillary Clinton and Elizabeth Dole have secretly agreed to their first public debate on The Jerry Springer Show, sources confirmed late today as The Glimpse went to press.

"This promises to be a much less civil encounter than the pro wrestling matches their husbands staged back during the 1996 presidential campaign," said a spokesman for the Jerry Springer show. "We are definitely hiring extra bouncers and cut men for this show. These girls just flat out don't like each other."

hillary_051699.jpg (8596 bytes)White House officials reluctantly acknowledged that First Lady Hillary Clinton has agreed to participate in the Springer episode. "Mrs. Clinton is really looking forward to this gig," one source confided. "This type of venue has gained a lot of mainstream acceptability since the election of Jesse Ventura to the governor's mansion in Minnesota."

Mrs. Dole informed The Glimpse that she intended "to lay some whipass" on the First Lady during the upcoming debate. "There seems to be some confusion about the purpose of this confrontation," she said during a meeting with Glimpse editors. "This is an opportunity for us to discuss in an intelligent way some of the leading issues facing our country as we hurtle toward the 21st century and to find out once and for all which one of us looks better in a slit skirt and cheap halter top."

eliz_dole_051699.jpg (13271 bytes)Protocol issues have reportedly been a major stumbling block in negotiations between the two camps over the upcoming event. According to reliable sources, the two women readily agreed that the concept of the episode would revolve around   "First Lifestyles and the First Men Who Define Them." But it has been difficult to agree on a surprise guest, or guests, that will be brought on to stimulate the debate.

"The surprise guest has to provide a spark that incites in the other guests an irrational reaction of anger and violence," said the Springer show representative. "At first we tried to get their husbands to agree, but their fees were just way out of our ballpark."

"After a lot of discussion we found out that both Mrs. Clinton and Mrs. Dole have kind of an Urban Cowboy thing for Jerry himself," the source said. "They won't admit that he's a turn-on, of course, but there is something forbidden and provocative about Jerry Springer.

springerhat.jpg (6928 bytes)"So during the episode Jerry will slip into some exciting costumes and then appear as the surprise guest himself," the official said. "We think this could become a new model for political debate as well as kinky subject for a future Jerry episode."


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